Love me or Beloved
by Tea-StainedBrain
Summary: The 16-year-old Kyoko has been trying to lead her 'ordinary' school life, but her life was pretty...in disarray, with part-times, her status as a school idol and love confessions. But the most sick and creepiest confession of all was probably that transfer student Dame-Tsuna's... Dark! & Yandere!Tsuna 2795
1. Sasagawa Kyoko

**Love Me or Beloved  
**

 **Warning:** OOC-Kyoko, OCC-Tsuna, Dark! Tsuna.

 **Disclaimer: I don't own KHR.**

* * *

 **Sasagawa Kyoko**

I had a feeling that I forgot some bits and pieces of my past.

I once voiced this concern to a psychiatrist about this. But then I was laughed off as a paranoid child.

I felt insulted at the time, but, in hindsight, I, now sixteen, could understand her disbelief.

In the first place, it's not like I had any concussion of a kind to develop amnesia (at least that's what I learned from TV drama).

My name is Sasagawa Kyoko. I am an ordinary high school student of Namimori High to the truest sense.

Well, except the fact that I am staying at an orphanage, a secret I hid from my school mates.

I spaced out blankly at the blackboard, spotting a mop of gravity-defying brown hair, Sawada Tsunayoshi, aka. Dame-Tsuna, making a fool of himself in front of Neji and the class with his horribly wrong algebra logic. He was a transfer student coming here last month, but he soon made a (notorious) name for himself. Strangely, his poker face does not even twitch even one bit at the insults.

 _Ding-Dong-Ding-Dong!_

Ah! Here comes the bell for lunch time. Let me tell you about my younger days later. For now, I need to get moving otherwise...

"Sasagawa!"

Crap!

I turned my face, not forgetting to plaster an impeccable fake smile I always had on.

Before me was Moshida Kensuke. A second-year from class B and a kendo captain. Also the school's male idol. (I could already see some girls blushing in the background.)

"Meet me on the rooftop, yeah?" said senpai.

"Ah–" as I was about to reject, he already dashed to the rooftop.

This is going to be a pain afterwards, but I guess I will do as he say so as not to hurt his feelings...

* * *

Contrary to my 'dense' image, I was not all that dense.

For one thing, I noticed that I am admired as a girl idol of this school. And that's to be expected as I have been working hard to achieve a delicate and refined girl's image...

Another thing is that I always know when a guy has a feeling for me. And, yeah, I'm well aware that Mochida-senpai who has made his way around me lately is having feelings for me.

At this point, you might be expecting me to squeak, 'Kya, senpai noticed me!' But, sorry, I am totally not interested in any men as of now. The reason is because, for financial reasons, I am holding several part times after school, so I have no time for romance, which is also a secret I hide from people at school.

And I know full well what Mochida is planning to do right now.

I opened the door to the rooftop, seeing Moshida standing firm with that tiringly confident smile on his face. Not only senpai, a crowd of first and second years were flocking around to see the school's two idols.

"Kyoko, please go out with me."

I really wanna roll my eyes literally.

He is probably think he is in a romantic teenage film right now, believing I would be more than willing to be in his company like many other girls in this school. Well, at least his feelings for me seem genuine.

Not wanting to hurt him, I try to choose my word carefully, "Someone like me... wouldn't deserve to be with senpai..."

Mochida-senpai shook his head vigorously at that, "Not at all! You're so pretty that all guys in my class fell in love with you, you know!"

Sorry, but I am actually a tough girl who wouldn't blush at such kind words, so I continue, bowing most respectfully "Therefore, I have to reject you.

That made Mochida uncharacteristically speechless.

After a minute or two, the information sank in, and the crowd scattered muttering disappointed words.

Looking at Moshida one last time, I apologise sincerely again before leaving the rooftop.

* * *

Crap! I'm late for my job.

As I was storming the school hallway as soon as the school finished, I was dragged into an empty glass room by a few pairs of hands.

Then, abruptly, I was thrown forcefully on a chair. Ouch, that hurts.

"How dare you seduce Moshida-senpai!" said the bitch in front of me, pulling my hair so hard that I start to tear up.

"And still you crush his feelings like nothing!" said the bully queen's minion

"Thinks guys are all over ye just because you've got a pretty face, Tsk–," another minion bitch spitted on my face.

It's always like this.

After I manage to become this school idol, while I attract admiration from boys, I also attract hatred and hostility from girls at the same time.

Then I felt a slap on my face. One slap. Two slap. Three slap. Four slap.

I have to accept the price for my social status, I'm telling myself, but my will is slowly crumbing as the leader girl approaches me with that sharp object. Is that scissors?

"Wh-What are you going to—!?" I blurted out in horror.

"Ha-ha! After being a mute bitch for a while, you now got worked up, huh?"

As she took the scissors just five centimetres from face, and I closed my eyes in fears, the supposedly locked door suddenly snapped open.

Seeing the figure behind the door, I lightened up. It was Shimizu-sensei, our history teacher!

"Hey, you girls, what are you doing!" he asked.

The girls suddenly put the sharp object away, "J-Just friendly talks."

"There is a student who reported bullying in this room just a while

ago, though..." sensei muttered.

Bullying? But I thought no one would notice. After all, they would be busy packing up, leaving school and going to karaoke. Anyway, it was a good timing; I was saved!

* * *

After having been saved miraculously yesterday, I was super late for my part time. Still, today I am back in school again.

But the first thing that greeted me in my class was:

"Morning, Kyoko, should we continue yesterday while having lunch," said the blond-haired bully queen

I pitied myself mentally, but, before things got awkward, my only friend, Hana-chan, thankfully intervened, "Hey, Rin, stop teasing Kyoko."

Rin's face suddenly paled, "K-Kurokawa! I-I thought, you..."

Hana stood between me and the blond bitch, "To my relative's funeral in Hokkaidou? I just got back yesterday's night, you see..."

Then revelation dawned upon her, "S-So you were the one who... to Shimizu-sensei...—" But she then closed her mouth to prevent having her 'teasing' antics exposed. What a coward.

"Tell sensei what? I was back to my house at 1 am, ya know," Hana was confused.

What? If it wasn't Hana, then who?

In the midst of all this argument, a certain brunet suddenly spilled his milk on the cross-legged Rin's skirt, muttering "sorry" almost indiscernibly.

"Dame-Tsuna, you f**king clumsy wimp!" she slapped the heck out of Sawada, making him fall on the table hard with a cracking sound. She then moved on to deliver a few more kicks on a weaker student.

Unable to take this any more, I started to tear up unknowingly.

Almost as if sensing my tears, Sawada stood up like it didn't hurt at all and walked towards me, his eyes shadowed under his brown mop, plucking out a handkerchief from his pocket before handing them to...

It was then that Mochida chose to make his entrance to my class.

At the sight of me crying, plus Sawada being less than a metre from me, Mochida charged in like a mad elephant, snatching Sawada's shirt collar, "Why are you making Kyoko f**king cry!?"

Getting no response from Tsuna, Mochida was about to punch the heck out of the poor guy, but I decided to stop him, trying to explain "No! Sawada did nothing wrong! He simply slipped his own foot and..."

"...hurt you. I see," Mochida finished the sentence off for me. He even attempted to embrace me as an act of comfort (which I appreciate, but no thanks). Luckily, Hana prevented that with a "you stupid, conclusion-jumping monkey".

Ignoring the comment, senpai glared at the brown-haired transfer student. With his shinai (bamboo sword), he pointed at Sawada's face, "I challenge you to a match. Today after school dojo, okay?"

Again, before the brunet could refuse his challenge, Mochida dashed away from the class room.

Feeling utter pity for poor Sawada, I apologised instantly, "I'm really sorry for dragging you into this mess! I-I will tell everything to Mochida and hope he will—"

Dame-Tsuna shook his head meekly, then mumbling almost in whisper, "It's okay, so please don't cry." I can't hear really well, but his voice was soothing, almost nostalgically.

What broke my trance then was the bell signalling the start of the class and our homeroom teacher entering the room.

* * *

I guess I was a coward after all.

I was so afraid of the 'delicate girl' image I worked so hard to achieve getting blown away.

I was so afraid that people would bully me even harder if I had a fight of Mochida.

I was afraid I would be bullied so hard that I can't go to part time jobs for a while...

After school, I ended up by-standing among the excited hoard of student around the dojo. In the middle was a lanky brunet and a smug kendo captain.

The victory is already obvious. This is nothing but a bullying in the name of revenge match!

"Let me explain the rule," began Mochida with his brave smile, "since you probably don't understand kendo rules, I will let you win with just one ippon (one hit)."

"Wow, senpai, you must be very confident of your skill," a club member commented.

"But well, it's Dame-Tsuna we're talking about." A burst of laughter.

With his usual apathetic face, dame-Tsuna nodded at the condescending rule his senpai set.

"Now, get in your suit," said Senpai, pointing at the blatantly weighed-up armour, so heavy that three of his club members had to carry it. But dame-Tsuna complied, putting on the 'cheating' armour suit without any complaints. As if it is nothing heavy.

After the referee signalled a go, Mochida made the first rapid move towards the still Tsuna.

Probably from the weight of his armour, dame-Tsuna miraculously rolled away from the hit.

"Uwahaha, let's see if you can dodge this," Mochida threw a couple more swings, but the same thing happened. They didn't hit.

Now, that's strange.

"50 seconds left." said the referee.

With that, even Mochida felt a bit pressed for time to score against his weak opponent, throwing more aggressive swings at the brunet.

I even have my hope up a bit that Sawada may get put of this alive.

But, suddenly, he _tripped_ on the floor, royally, face down.

Seeing this as a golden opportunity, Mochida's minion (I mean, club member) raised the red flag, cueing Mochida's victory, making it look as if it was Mochida's hit that caused Tsuna to fall.

"It's my victory," declared Mohida smugly, "So as a prize, I will have Kyoko as my girlfriend!"

"Eh?" I interjected. What? I properly rejected him!

Mochida then made a blatant lie, "You see, guys, Sawada had been stalking her lately, so she felt too anxious to go out with me. But with the threat gone she could be by my side without worries!"

Then everyone became like "I see. I see. Mochida-senpai is so nice. Kyoko, you lucky girl."

So I had no choice but to smile along for now, but I will properly make my will clear to him again later...

* * *

With my mind occupied, I didn't notice the brown-haired boy slipping out of the room with a clenched fist.

* * *

So, after the event, we are at the back of the school, where I immediately went straight to the point, "Mochida-senpai, I don't like you, so please don't force your love on me!"

Now not in front of the school people, Mochida sighed, "I know, but you see."

Before I knew it he was cornering me to the building's wall, laughing darkly "I need to have you no matter what. Because as idols we are destined to be together." He bent his face towards mine. I knew what he was about to do right away.

"No!" I squirmed in reflex, expecting a disgusting sensation on my mouth...

But that never came.

Instead I heard an "Arghhhh! My face!"

Curious, I opened my eyes. Only to see that horrible spectacle— of Mochida's face burning in flames...?

Even more shocking was that gravity-defying brown mop and a sickening smile popping up in front of me, looking at me with his gentle hazelnut eyes. In a stark contrast to the otherworldly happening to Mochida, he was serenely offering me kind words of "Are you okay." This time in clear, articulate voice I wouldn't imagine from the 'meek' transfer student.

Now with a burnt face, Mochida was pissed off, directing a harsh question "Did you do this to my precious face?

Then almost as if making a 360-degree flip, Sawada rotated to Mochida with a lunatically murderous glare. His eyes now flashed sunset orange!

"Precious?" grunted the brunet venomously, then clapping his hand, "more precious than her feelings?"

At the clap, Mochida's right arm went bursting into flames as well. Without Sawada even making any move.

"Arghh! My arm!"

At this gruesome occurrence, the brunet crouched down giggling to the pained kendo captain who previously defeated him but now cringed in pain on the floor, trying to put out the flames.

"If I do this..." Sawada Tsunayoshi began with a paradoxically innocent smile that would beckon affection had he not just burnt a guy's arm. The smile then morphed into a vindictive snarl "you won't be able to touch Kyoko-chan, right!?"

'Kyoko-chan'? How could dame-Tsuna be on the first name basis with me?

A-Anyway, what's happening?

"A-As I thought! You are after Kyoko as well!" Mochida said in utterly insecure voice.

Dame-Tsuna (though I'm not sure if he is 'dame' or not anymore) clicked his tongue like he's dealing with a pest at that, before choosing to smile sardornically, "I tried to look after her from afar, interfering with her life as little as possible, but I guess I can't hind my love for her after all."

Mochida then paled, "So... It's true that you have been stalking her."

"So _annoying_ ," groaned the sunset-eyed boy, clapping his hand once more, so Mochida's entire body was now engulfed in that inferno-ish orange flame.

With a sigh of relief, totally tuning out the cry of agony, Sawada locked his now kind hazelnut-brown eyes onto mine, "I'm sorry. I really don't want you to see me like this, Kyoko-chan."

I was rendered speechless at that point. Noticing this, the brunet decided to go on with his talking.

"It has been a while, Kyoko-chan," said Sawada who suddenly hugged me warmly.

At that, I was broken away from my shock. My immediate reaction was to push this twisted-minded murderer away and a shudder.

That clearly saddened him, and his smile dropped. At this rate, would he kill me too? I covered my face in fear of this man's unpredictable behaviours.

"I made me sad to know you think I will kill you..."

"!" Could he read mind?

"But," the brunet said with a heartbreakingly shattered voice, extending his hand to cup my cheek tenderly "One thing I can say for sure: I will never harm you."

With such a resolution, his eyes flashed orange again.

"I will protect you" he said assuringly, "just like this morning, yesterday and many other days!"

I was, for a moment, entranced by those exquisite sunset-coloured eyes, which, though twisted, offered me sincere love and care.

That was a fated encounter, the beginning of our mental roller coaster ride...

* * *

 _Yo, there, tea-stainedbrain here. I hope Yandere!Tsuna in 2795 is not too weirdly OOC. I've seen an attempt at Yandere!Kyoko, but not Yandere!Tsuna yet, so I was itching to try it, thus ending up writing this. (Yes, I'm in a writer's bloc for **Part-Time Mafia Boss**.)_

 _Anyway, I intend to make this a one-shot. Unless it is popular enough (which you could contribute by writing reviews and clicking follow/fav)._


	2. Sawada Tsunayoshi

**Love Me or Beloved  
**

 **Warning:** OOC-Kyoko, OCC-Tsuna, Dark! Tsuna.

 **Disclaimer: I don't own KHR.**

* * *

 **Sawada Tsunayoshi**

"Today, a transfer student will be joining your class."

Said the glass-cladded teacher before class 1-A I am going to become a part of from today onwards.

The older man then turned to my direction, "Hey, you, come in!"

Ignoring his harsh words, I decided to step into the class, making the most convincing impression of a meek boy as possible.

Yes, at this school, I'm going to be a pitiable meek boy. Not that I like meek boy or is truly a meek boy to the core myself. (In fact, the me right now the opposite of that.)

Why then? Well, that's for the sake of being with my beloved.

As soon as I stepped into that room, the first thing I did was not introduction, but scanning the room for her.

I'm totally confident that she would be here since I personally made sure that I would be in the same class as hers.

Ah, I found her sitting in the fourth row in the middle. How much she has changed! Her orange hair, once short, is now let down to grow so long and feminine. The cute girl I knew has become such a dainty and delicate lady. Her sight alone makes my heart founder. She is definitely my god—

"Ahem! Ahem! SAWADA, introduce yourself," the bastard, I mean teacher, urged me on.

I couldn't help but give him my signature death glare (which made him shudder a bit) for interrupting my eye feast.

Shit, I forgot! I need to act 'meek' and stupid. Erasing my glare, I began:

"M-M-My name is S-Sawada Tsunayo-yoshi" I faked stutters and looked at my school shoes for the 'shy' effect.

The teacher sighed, "Alright, please take that empty seat near Kurokawa."

I took my seat, which thankfully was just three places away from Kyoko-chan! I gave her a glance one last time, which she noticed and responded to with an oblivious smile.

Of course, she wouldn't remember me.

 _But... But... BUT, but, but..._

 _I will change that. I will change that. I am gonna change that._

That's why I'm _here_ for!

I only need to find a situation where we are ALONE.

* * *

'She' is so popular at her school now. How different from the younger her I knew.

And that's _annoying_.

She is always surrounded by people.

Let me sum up that there are three main obstacles to our love:

1)Kurokawa Hana

Her best friend. I'm grateful for her protecting Her from envious bitches and lowly catcall bastards, but, Kurokawa, you're TOO close to Kyoko. You're ALWAYS with Kyoko. It's time you leave her... to ME...

2)Her bullying bitches

They should die. I'm dying to personally deal with them had they not been mere civilians. Just wait.

3)confessing school boys

The most death-worthy ones of all.

Kyoko-chan, Don't say yes. Don't say yes. Don't say yes. Don't say yes! DON'T Belong. to. Other. PeOplE!

Otherwise, they will be 'cursed' to _death_ , you know...

* * *

After school, she rushed straight to her part time places, leaving me no space to approach her.

Why does a delicate girl like her deserve to work three part-times while at a high school!?

At 2 am, after part time jobs at McDonalds, a convenience store and an internet cafe (yes, I was _looking after he_ r from afar all this time), Kyoko-chan was back at home. Ah, it seems She is now in a new orphanage.

"I'm back, everyone," She said entering the institution.

"Welcome back and good job, Kyoko-chan," an old woman greeted her.

Is this hag the old witch who makes her work so much?

"Landlady, you're still up?" said Kyoko-chan.

"I haven't finished knitting globes for the kids in preparation for the winter yet," the old hag explains.

"That's not good!" She said in heart-shatteringly concerned tone, "Ma'am, you need to rest!"

The old woman laughed tiredly, "Alright, then. Kyoko-chan, too, you don't need to work all that hard to get us enough money. You should also enjoy your youth too."

"...yes" she said sadly with head down.

She uttered a few good nights to the staff and got into her room as quietly as a church mouse. Unsurprisingly, it was a shared room, with other kids already sound asleep. She lay down in a lower bunk bed and drifted off to sleep almost immediately.

After having judged that they wouldn't do _harm_ to Her, I decided to leave.

* * *

A month has passed and I still haven't got to discuss about our memories with Her on one-to-one basis. Sigh.

Recently, there was this guy, Mochida Kensuke, I think, who had been trying to get TOO close to Kyoko.

According to my research, at school, he is highly popular, idol-level like Kyoko-chan, with his looks and position as the kendo club's captain. He is a senior, class 2-B. Quite a playboy...

 _Playboy_!? I can't let him near Her more than this! Once I get out of the public eyes, I will start by burning that face he uses to seduce Kyoko-chan, then his arms, finally his entire body, to ash. Then everyone is going to take it as human combusti—

"Sawada! Come out and answer Q.13!"

As if trying to get in my scheming way, the phoney of a math teacher asked me to solve that ridiculously easy question that doesn't even need thinking on my part.

However, I need to maintain an impression of being stupid.

Why? I need to be by her side. And for that to happen, I can't get exposed.

I can't let others know the fact that I have...superhuman abilities.

Huh? Not like Superman. I'm not an alien. I'm not a magician and all that jazz either. Let's say all math theorem on earth had been _downlo_ —

"Sawada! What are you spacing out for!" the teacher snarled at me.

"Y-Y-Yes" I said meekly, standing up. Walked to the blackboard and wrote a stupid answer.

Then a few more insults from that math 'elite' (whose real background I am aware of) and those stupid high schoolers.

As always, humans are so absurd.

With the exception of Her, of course.

* * *

Ah, Kyoko-chan is getting bullied again.

After that bastard Mochida mindlessly confessed to her, it provoked these stupid jealous bitches.

As much as I would like to burn their hair till they went bald then slice their lim— no good, calm down, Tsuna. You can't do that to a group of civilians. Or else, you will be sent back.

Looking through the binoculars, once it starts to get out of hand, I will notify to notify the teacher office...

* * *

That bitch is bothering Her again. Really, I should have killed her then.

For now, it was a waste of my milk but she deserved it.

"Dame-Tsuna! You f**king wimp!"

She said. And I could sense in a slow motion (as that is how my intuition was programmed). I could doge it with ease. It's nowhere near my usual experiences, but I would let it slide.

Faster than a blink of human eye, I turned my body, landing on the floor safely while kicking a few tables for plausible effect.

The bitch proceeded to deliver me a few more kicks, which I decided to just let her do it. Because after all I can't feel pain.

But, oh dear, in the corner of my eyes, I saw Kyoko-chan crying.

Don't cry, my precious Kyoko-chan!

I reflexively stood up, plucked my handkerchief out and was about to hand it to her when that Mochida bastard appeared... Sigh.

* * *

I ended up in this child's fight. Sigh. That stupid kendo freak. He's trying hard to impress Her. But, sorry, She is not destined to be with you.

I such a huge crowd like this, I could at most dodge the attack.

"50 seconds left."

This suit may be heavy for normal humans, but it has absolutely no effect on my body. Even so, it went against the force of gravity, so I ultimately slid near the end.

That Mochida guy immediately claimed this as his victory.

Wah~ how lame. In fact, I'm so pissed that just because he's a civilian, I can't be cool in front of Kyoko-chan.

Still, I calmed my mind down a bit and was about to let it gone, be bygone until...

"And as a price, I will have Kyoko-chan as my girlfriend."

 **What!? You bastard!**

I could feel flames burning in my body. I could have burned the entire hall to ground right now. Kyoko-chan is not your possession! You can't just force her. These scums! They need to be wiped out from the surface of the earth, making it cleaner place for Kyoko-chan to live in.

Calm down, Tsuna. _Calm down_ , Tsuna. You must find the right moment to move.

* * *

That scum of a human just totally ignored Kyoko's will. How could you even call that love.

Being fellow idols? Don't make me laugh. How twisted are you. Even someone like me don't think like that.

Love is somethings deeper. I think it's like... being unable to live without Her... wanting to merge completely with Her... wanting to occupy Her mind... wanting to own every single thing about Her...mouth, eye, heart, hair,...

So, I clapped my hand to summon flame to the trash's face, all according to my plan.

"Arggghh"

Ignoring the pig's cry, I made a beeline to Kyoko-chan checking if she is okay, and still untouched by him.

Kyoko-chan looked at me, dazed at what was happening.

Ah, I have been wanting to show you this flame. I have been working hard to make it pure and beautiful, just for you.

"You! You did this tommy precious face!?" that low-life barked at me.

Ha, ha! Don't make me laugh, you scum.

 **YOU DON'T DESERVE KYOKO-CHAN.**

With that verdict, I gave him another punishment.

"My arm!... hah... so i-it was tr-true that you have been stalking her."

Stalking? If you mean by following her when leaving her house, in class, lunchtime, after school, doing part-time, going home, going to bath, sleeping. Then maybe?

Sigh. Never mind scum's word. "How annoying," I said apathetically, deciding I'm sick of torturing this lowly human, so I would just burn him to ashes now. *clap*

Having finished my cleansing duty, I turned to Kyoko-chan.

"It has been a while, Kyoko-chan!"

I did it! I finally got to speak to her after these many years. I couldn't help but hug her as we always did when we—

But what I got in return was a disgusted push back.

Of course, I probably looked like a monster in her eyes.

"I'm sorry. I really don't want you to see me like this," I gave her a sincere apology.

"But," I said with determination, "I will protect you like this morning, yesterday and many other days before."

Then Kyoko-chan went silent. But, god, our eyes met! Her eyes are so beautiful. Like doe's eyes in auburn colour. Ah, I'm so embarrassed...

Gently caressing her cheeks, I gave her a peck on her forehead

like she did for me back then when I'm having a panic attack.

"Have you calmed down?" I asked.

"What happened to S-Senpai?" was her shaky reply.

I sighed, "Could you please not think of _other_ people when we're finally reunited!"

Her face went totally pale, "R-R- _Reunited_? Excuse me, but have we ever met before?"

I felt a tear drop down my cheek. Ah, it's always painful when it comes to her.

"Of course, you wouldn't remember," I said in resignation, "But we could begin a new relationship, starting from now, yeah?" I felt an overly wide grin stretching on my face.

She took a few steps backwards. Ah, that

* * *

hurts, Kyoko-chan.

"I miss you... Kyoko-chan..." I tried.

"E-Excuse me, but I don't want a _stranger_ to call me by my first name," she spoke back in terror, standing up and slipping away from my sight.

Damn, I messed up.

* * *

Next morning, I waited in front of Kyoko-chan's place.

"Good morning," I tried to greet her, but what I got back was a sheer expression of shock: Kyoko-chan went pale, stepping back, even dropping her bag. Ah, it hurts, you know, Kyoko-chan.

"Go away!" She shooed.

"Okay," I tried to give her a smile and did as she requested.

Oh, but she dropped her lunch box...

* * *

During a break, that bitch was bothering her again, so I decided to punish her a bit.

"Kyaaa! My hair!" the blind girl went panic, trying to put the flames on her precious hair away.

"Ku..." I almost couldn't suppress my laugh.

But that, for some reason, made Her very angry. She even sent me a glare of hate.

"Come to see me this lunchtime." she said.

Oh, I got the permission.

* * *

"Kyoko-chan, here is your bento. you dropped it this morning," I said, handing her the yellow-orange container.

She snatched it away swiftly with suspicion.

"You know, Kyoko-chan, I'm so glad that you—"

"Could we get to the point," she suddenly interrupted my small talk.

"What point?" I asked, confused.

"What is that flame thing!? Am I dreaming," she asked, looking at me with desperate face. Oh, Kyoko-chan.

"It's my dying will flame," I explained, even though I'm not supposed to reveal this to a civilian, but if it's Kyoko-chan then...,"my ability."

"B-B-But," Kyoko-chan's voice was shaking, "Is that human? Just clapping and things went in flames."

Then She finally _touched_ me– on my shoulder. Wah~ I'm in heaven.

"T-Tell me," she shook my shoulder panically, "That it was just a coincidence. That it was human combustion happening to senpai and you just happen to clap your hands then!"

I was about to tell her the truth, but then, seeing her desperate eyes, I decided to lie, "Yeah, I was just kidding. I happen to be in the area when that human combustion happened."

Kyoko-chan's face gained colour again, before saddening again, "Then what about this morning?"

"Just like yesterday," I lied again, embracing her assuringly, "don't worry. Nothing will happen to you."

"B-But it doesn't change the fact that senpai is dead." she still went on.

"COULD YOU STOP TALKING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE IN FRONT OF ME" I snapped at her... before I knew it. I just couldn't take it anymore. I tried so hard. We used to be so close and inseparable. Why is it that I don't have any part of her mind now?

That made her cry. Oh no, I messed up. Wh-What should I-I do.

"Ah, K-Kyoko-chan. I'm sorry,"

I apologised, holding her hands, which she only slapped away.

"I'm sorry.I'm sorry.I'm sorry.I'm sorry.I'm sorry.I'm sorry.I'm sorry" I said more in hysteria.

What can I do to stop her crying?

Ah, should I try that?

As she was bawling her eyes away, I gently raised her chin up

to look at my eyes before tenderly pressing my mouth onto hers.

"!"

That lasts no longer than a few seconds.

"Please don't cry," I said, wiping tears away from her widened eyes, "I want you to be happy."

But then she pushed me away weakly, "I _hate_ you!"

"That hurts, Kyoko-chan," I said this out loud, "You can hate me, but I can't stop loving you, you know? Don't worry, I will always _love_ you."

She looked at me with terrified eyes, "You're nuts!" Before running away from me.

Ah, I messed up again.

* * *

 **End of Chapter 2**

 _Author's note:_

 _Hi, as requested, I update it! Hope you enjoyed it! As for the question whether this is an AU, yes, it is. And thanks for your encouraging reviews, it really motivated me to (waste my revision time) uploading this chapter_


	3. Boy Meets Girl

**Love Me or Beloved  
**

 **Warning:** OOC-Kyoko, OCC-Tsuna, Dark! Tsuna.

 **Disclaimer: I don't own KHR.**

* * *

 **Sawada Tsunayoshi**

Today's date: Oct 14, with a red cross marked on it.

Was what I woke up to this morning.

Right, I would become 8 today.

I tiredly dragged myself out of my hard bed and starched sheet, unwillingly reached my feet onto the unheated floor.

No slippers. No rugs. No heating.

As usual.

As I took off my blue pyjamas, now too tight and short for my growing body, I looked at the calendar again.

I learn to take note of October 14 as a day of yearly routine. It's called "Birthday" by adults.

I walked down the hallway, quietly thanks to my light weight. I got to the kitchen as usual, detecting the familiar silhouette in the corner of my eye.

As always, she just had her slices of toast and a mug of coffee. Alone.

Passing her without sparing a glance, I opened a cabinet and picked out a cup noodle, opened the seal lid and poured in some hot water. By the time the noodle was done, Mu— I mean—Nana-san was thankfully out of the kitchen.

Settling down to dip into my breakfast. Dad always said that it's not good for the body, but I couldn't care less. It's what I have always had for the last few years. Speaking of Dad, he often asked if Nana-san ever hurt me. I shook my head. Nana-san never hurt me. She never hit or kicked me. She is always the same. Blank.

After binning the noodle cup and all, Nana-san made a rare appearance in the kitchen.

"Today is your birthday," said her in usual monotonous voice.

"Yes," I replied without even giving a look.

"We're supposed to act like a mother and a child should. Like other years," she said with a yawn.

"..."

"Meet me at the entrance in fifteen minutes." Was the order.

"...Yes."

* * *

It was an annual routine of the Sawada household.

On the 14th of October, we went out to let the neighbours 'see hugs and love.' At least, that's what I called it.

Midori-san next door greeted my mum cheerily, "Good morning,Mrs Sawada. Are you taking your child out to play?"

Nana-san put on her perfect smile, bending down to run her cold hands through my unkempt hair. "It's our dear boy's birthday, you see..."

"Right, I see. You're such a caring mother."

At that time, I didn't even think that Nana-san was a hypocrite at all. The concept of 'caring' and 'love' was still alien to me.

"Then, see you later," Nana-san bowed respectfully before leashing me on.

Once we got near the playground, Nana-san made a sudden pause like a hanged robot.

Looking me with those dry eyes, she ordered, "Stay here. And don't do something unnecessary. I will go home for a bit."

Nodding obediently, I settled down in a bench.

Then, my eyes drifted to the sandbox before me, where a girl with orange hair, shaping the sand into weird shapes.

Curious, I glued my eyes on her construction.

As if noticing my stare, she looked up and waved her hand as a cue for me to sit next to her.

So I did.

Then she started explaining, even without me asking, her creation.

"This is the castle plan that me, onii-chan, mummy and daddy will live together."

I nodded.

She pointed at one of the square mark, resembling a window, "This is living room." Then "This is my bedroom. Next to onii-chan's" to other squares. "Every night, mama kisses me a good night in my bedroom."

I was totally confused, "You mum kisses you indoors"

She looked back at me with confused expression as well and a pout, "What do you mean?"

"Aren't kissing and hugging what you do outdoors? Out of your home, I mean?"

It was then that Nana-san made an appearance, taking me by shoulders. "Excuse me, young lady, but it's time he needs to go home. He played way too much," she said with her perfect smile, then leading me out of the park. Once we turned around the corner, she faced me with her blank face again, "Didn't I tell you— Don't do the unnecessary."

"Sorry," I said.

"Let go home. Iemitsu-san is coming this year, you know!" Nana-san said with a rare display of delirious

* * *

"Tsuna, it's your daddy here," a blond man said to me.

"Dad?" I couldn't recognise him. Must have been a long time since I last saw him that I kinda forgot his face.

Today, Nana-san was being happier than usual. She even made us a hot pot. More importantly, I even got to join her meal today.

After dinner, I was shipped off to straight bed.

I woke up with a dry throat, so I guess I would grab a glass in the kitchen.

As I walked pst the corridor, I saw light on in Nana-san's room.

"Nana, I know how you have been treating Tsunayoshi all this time,"

said an older man's voice.

"What do you mean?" Nana asked back in high pitch.

"He is your son, so you should shower him with love and care."

Curious, I decided to stand quietly outside.

Then, I cowered at a sudden burst of intensity from Nana-san, "What do you KNOW? You left me and that child alone here in Namimori." Then a burst of crying. "why don't you take me to Italy as well."

Dad sighed, "I decided that Tsunayoshi would lead his life as a normal citizen."

"Yes! Because he's so frail and sickly!" Nana-san whined in exhaustion.

"He's a healthy boy! It's just his immunity is not very good, and unable to use dying will flames. That's why we can't live together."

Dying will flames?

Dad went on, "Look, Nana, would you be satisfied if your son's health is 'fixed'?"

The crying stopped. That was the time when I decided to make my leave now.

* * *

"You will go to a hospital, to get treated," said Nana-san who handed me to Dad.

"Okay," I said, sipping the tea she ordered me to drink.

* * *

When I woke up it was all white. White walls. White floor. White ceiling.

Even my shirt and pant were white, like hospital uniform.

But it was not just me. There were many kids my age.

But a certain girl captured my interest. The one with orange hair. The one I met at the park.

She raised her face, meeting my eyes by accident. Her eyes were swollen and puffy.

But, then, she put her back between knees in convulsive sobs. She didn't seem to remember my face.

All of a sudden, the only TV monitor of the white room was remotely switched on with a loud zzz. A curly green hair guy, a European, with glinting glassed appeared on thr screen.

"Alright, brats, listen!"

But there were still cries here and there.

Ignoring the noise that would wrench most people's heart, the green man cleared his throat to be louder, "You can well consider yourself without parents now. You're now under my jurisdiction. You simply need to do what we say, understand?"

The cries in the room then grew louder, obviously to the irritation of the man in a white lab coat, who clicked his tongue with "You cannot escape until you're discharged! At least remember that!" And the screen was off.

Honestly, I couldn't care less if my parents came to pick me up back home or not. We're like strangers anyway.

Then I felt a nudge on my white shirt. I turned to see the sobbing orange-haired girl.

"I-I-Is this an orphanage?" said her with a shaky voice.

"No," I told her what I knew, "Dad said it's a hospital."

"Hospital?" she repeated my word with more sobs, "b-but, I'm not sick!"

Not knowing what to say, I shrugged.

"Mum! Dad! Onii-chan!" she mumbled and teared up again.

"Calm down." I tried to be reasonable. "You live in a new place with new rules now, that's all."

I didn't expect to see an angry face in return. I was asked "Don't you care about your parents at all!?"

I could only raise my eyebrows at her question. Care, you say?

"You're such a weird kid!" she pouted.

Meh, you're a kid too, and I couldn't care less about you either.

* * *

Three days passed since we arrived in this place. I was adjusting fine. The food, always burnt porridge, was a but more disgusting than cup noodle, though.

Deep in thought and craving for cup noodles, I crashed into someone, spilling porridge on their uniform in process.

"Oi, you Wimp!"

I looked up, seeing a yankee-looking blond-haired guy, a few years older than me probably, with animalistic eyes, "Watcha' doing, hah!?"

Then a kick on my stomach followed. I fell face down on the ground. My head cracked a bit at the impact. The redness of blood. Pit-pat, pit-pat.

"Kneel down and said sorry!"

I was too exhausted from the hit to even get myself back in a proper dogeza or say a word (damn my weak heart), so I got another hit. Then a few more hits. "S...orr..y" I was able to say breathlessly finally.

Finally, the guy looked more satisfied, so he decided to leave me alone. Not before giving me a spit, though.

* * *

I took me like ten minutes to gather enough strength to stand up and crawl to the loo. On my way there, I walked past the orange girl, who I decided to ignore. But, she decided not to ignore me. She stopped me with a kyaa of horror and disbelief, "What happened to you! Blood everywhere!"

"Hah, hah," I panted trying to say 'I'm fine.'

"You need to treat your wounds! Let me look," she said with sad voice, grabbing my hand and leading me to the toilet.

With a wet towel, she gently wipe the blood cake on my body (but it still hurts!). "Wow, this is even worse than what my onii-chan had," she wondered aloud. Giving me an apologetic smile, "Sorry, but this is all I can use to disinfect your wound."

Gathering my energy, I said "Thank you," but it probably came across as a whisper.

But she heard it and gave me a smile that seemed to say "No problem."

* * *

"Hey, don't you miss your parent?" the orange girl, #95 or Kyoko-chan, asked me.

I shook my head.

"Weirdo," the girl laughed like it was a joke and said in a voice laced with nostalgia, "I miss Mum, Dad and Onii-chan, you know."

She would go on and on about how her mother was such a great cook. How they had sunny side-up eggs for breakfast. When I told her I always had cup noodles, she laughed it off. She told me how her strong onii-chan was reckless, but always protective of her. I told her that I'm an only child. How her dad may always come home late from work, but was always kind to her. When I told her that I could only remember three times that my dad came home. She laughed it off again.

When I asked about her mum kissing her before bedtime, explaining Nana-san never did that to me, she went all wide eyes and went "No way!"

"But what is love, exactly," I asked absentmindedly.

Kyoko-chan hugged me tightly in reply, "Like this!"

Ah, what a pleasant feeling. It's warm and fills up my whole heart.

"So do you love me?" I asked for assurance.

"Yes, I love you" was the reply with a smile.

If this is love then, "I love you too, Kyoko-chan!" I said embarrassedly.

"Believe me, your mum must care about you in her ways," she said, patting on my brown locks, an action I now found soothing and addictive. "Your dad may be away a lot, but he must be looking after you from afar."

What she said became almost like a soothing mantra for my heart.

Slowly, my memories of my family became morphed and shaped by her rosy lens of the world.

I started to believe that, maybe, maybe, it's still possible for my parents to become as fun to live with as Kyoko-chan's.

* * *

That was when I began to think of getting out of this white room as soon as possible. So my life would be completed with that warm feelings that fill my heart again.

Once I got to learn 'love,' I sought it desperately.

Finally, three months after my arrival.

"#27, you're called by master Verde," one adult in lab coat told me.

I obediently made my way to the famous 'green room,' as known by other kids in the place.

"Come on in," he said. Then the automatic door slid to let me in.

"Iemitsu's son, right," the green-haired man said nonchalantly, still interested in wiping in glasses, "You are sent here with special circumstance, so if you cooperate, then I will let you back home."

I got excited. Will I be able to start a new life with Nana-san and Dad with lots of 'love' and warm feelings? So I nodded and signed whatever form I was given.

* * *

What awaited me afterwards was beyond my wildest imagination. It was very, very, very, very, very disgusting, nauseous, atrocious, ridiculous, absurd, inhumane, twisted and wrapped. [It hurts. I hurts. It hurts.] I even came to understand that I'm no longer a human at the end of it. What am I? [It hurts It hurts. It hurts.] It really hurts for the eight-year-old me. It was hard for me sometimes, but Kyoko-chan's sunny smile and light-hearted laugh when we met would always cheered me up. But I became used to it by the time I turned nine. They do this, and that, that, that, then that, then this, and it to my body. That's all.

* * *

The day I was told that I was ten was also the day that my dad finally picked me up.

I ran to my dad as fast as I could. I expected his teary happy face that I finally came back to him, fixed. After all, he had been looking after me from afar.

But what welcomed me was indifferent eyes.

"Look, Tsunayoshi," he started as we're driving out of the institution, and I realised that I was not in Japan.

"Yes, Dad?" I said, trying to imitate the sweet smile Kyoko-chan always gave me. Dad would surely like this smile just how I loved Kyoko-chan's.

"I think it might not be wise for you to return to our... house..." Dad clearly tried to look for the right word, "L-Look, you're so frail."

"But I'm treated, Dad," I said with a pout, something I picked up from Kyoko-chan.

I am stronger and smarter. I don't even have a need for school any more, you know?

"The situation has changed," Dad shook his head tried to explain more, "You now have a brother."

My immediate response was "Cool, I won't be lonely, then." I almost saw Kyoko-chan's protective onii-chan in this new member of my family.

"You're ten now, so I will respect your decision," Dad said, pulling up at one luxurious condominium.

* * *

"I'm home, honey," said Dad.

"Welcome back, dear" I heard Kaa-san's sweet voice, and a 'daddy daddy!'

"Look, Yoshimune is learning to say 'daddy' and 'mummy'," she told Dad. I had a glimpse of a two-year-old boy with Dad's blond hair.

"Yoshimune would grow to be a smart and strong boy," Dad said, pecking a kiss on Kaa-san's cheek.

It's time I made myself known, "I'm home, Kaa-san."

Nana— Kaa-san went a bit pale at seeing me. At that time, I was convinced that she must be really 'happy' to see me (that she could pass out).

"Who are you?"

"Eh?" I was surprised at the question, while still managing to keep my smile intact, "What do you mean, O-Kaa-san?"

Taking a few steps away from me, she said in the familiar robotic voice, "I. Don't. Know. You."

Dad then decided to step in by looking at me seriously, whispering "See? Tsunayoshi, are you okay with your mum like this?

I forced a smile so I would be liked, "Yes, of course!"

* * *

I tried attending school, but neither middle school nor high school was challenging enough, so I was put in a university.

The reason? It all had to do with Verde's doing. He experimented transferring as much information into my head as possible (that's not what Dad asked for, but well...) Be it common knowledge material or university-level calculus. It was very traumatic when that happened, but I was quite grateful for him now.

It was easy to excel academically there. I skipped a year, two years, then the whole bachelor's degree. I was hailed by the press as a prodigy even. But who knows I was a 'man-made' prodigy?

As for sports, it's also thanks to Verde again. He not only fixed my weak heart but also all my organs and system to work as efficiently as possible. I was an athlete in no times. In fact, I was a regular in my uni's football team once.

None of this could be credited to my own effort, but I didn't care. All I hope is too please Nana— Kaa-san.

I would wave my certificates, my reports and my trophies, but she would walk past it as if I was nothing but an air, cooing my brother as usual.

I worked harder and harder. Dying to be acknowledged. To be recognised. To be praised. To be love. Desperate for that warm feelings, again.

But, but, but... no matter how much effort I put to be loved, Kaa-san wouldn't look in my way. She would always look at my brother...

Then the eleven me had an idea: What if I make my brother _disappear_?

* * *

"Tsunayoshi!" Dad screamed at me with the most passionate anger I ever felt. That even made me flinch. He stormed at me and slapped me hard many times. But I can't feel pain nor the numb.

"How could you... drown your own brother!" He said that and gave my neck a hard, vengeful grip.

I could feel air running out in my throat, but I was not at all terrified.

...

...

...

Ah, I see.

I now realised that Kyoko-chan was just too innocent about the way of this world. (But I can't blame her pureness)

Some parents were not in their right mind.

Some parents don't live their children.

Nana had always been not in the right mind. Look, she went completely nuts now. Look, she just mumbled who-knows what, lying down on the floor like an infant. Just because 'her child' killed her child.

Enough of this family play, right?

With this revelation, I freed my neck of Iemitsu's weak grip with my hand, pushing away, but I can't control my strength then, so he fell hard into the wall.

"How disappointing," I felt a few tears trickling down my cheek.

Regaining his stance, Iemitsu stormed to me again with angry roars like an animal, "I will KILL you!"

"How disappointing, Dad," I said with the last smile I would give him, "now that I finally get to show you my flames..."

I clapped my hands and the room went ablaze in flames, surprised at my own sad tone, "And you would be too weak to even survive this."

"Tsk," he spitted in disdain, "what dying flames. It's just a artificial mechanism to imitate dying will flames, right. You always have to clap your hands to ignite it. In other words, you can't access it dire— Arghhh... Arghhh." He screamed in pain as his limbs got devoured by the flames.

"But much more effective than the real one, riiight~?" I felt my mouth stretching into a grin voluntarily.

Maybe I will become weird like Nana-san, too, ha ha. That's our only relationship, I guess.

"M-Monster!"

I couldn't suppress my guffaw, "Is that a father's last word to their child. Ha ha."

Then my mood made a face-heel turn. I didn't feel like laughing any more. My heart was filled with rage, desperation and hunger.

I can't stand this anymore!

I ran out of the building, and decided that the whole damn thing would get burnt to nothingness.

The disgusting condominium I had been living my life of lies and self-delusion was bow engulfed in my beautiful orange flames. I guess, not exactly, mine, though...

Then what exactly is mine?

Stuck with that harsh reality, I used my hair to pluck some hair stand out of my head. Ah, the pain helped me calm down and think clearer.

Ah, so, so, soooo, what is mine?

Am I loved? Am I loved?

You're not.

Your parents don't love you. Your kaa-san didn't really care about me. She's too crazy for that.

Your dad didn't really care. Well, at least after he had another child.

So I'm not loved?

{ **Yes, I love you** } a cheery voice entered my brain like a hallucination.

"Yes!" I shouted out loud uncontrollably, "Kyoko-chan LOVES me! _She said she loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. She is the ONLY person who LOVES me!_ Yaay! Fu fu. Wah Ha ha ha hahah Ha ha ha hahah Ha ha ha ha!"

* * *

I woke up from the dream

that is not unusual. Well, more like a memory.

"Good morning, **Kyoko-chan** ," I said to 378 pictures of Her. In all sizes and all facial features o. my flat room walls. Oh dear, she is so breathtakingly cute.

"We _must_ fall in love once again."

* * *

 **End of Chapter 3**

 _Author's notes: How was that? Hope it's not too crazy! I enjoyed writing it though (UWa ha ha *maniac laugh*)_


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